Where Cable Went Wrong And Continues To Go Wrong

 

Recent entertainment headlines have highlighted, just how bad things are for traditional and cable TV. First Warner Bros. Discovery realized they were in shits creek with no paddle, when the NBA awarded a TV package to prime video over them. Then WBD and Paramount released figures and shared they were $9 billion and $11 billion respectively, in writes off due to their portfolios of cable networks no longer cutting it.

On the surface it may seem like streaming is leaving cable in the dust. While they maybe true...not so fast. The streaming wars that kicked off in the mid 2010's are losing steam, due to overstaturation and price increases with the content not meeting the price. Disney recently announced price hikes for Disney+, Hulu, and ESPN+. Pissed maybe an understatement for most people when they heard the news.

 While they keep raising prices. Companies have started to reevaluate can their individual platforms survive on their own or do they need to partner up? Many of these same companies are losing sleep over declining cable revenue which was their bread and butter at one time.

Both streaming and cables decline point to a lack of innovation in the media conglomerate world, namely a lack of rethinking cable television. Now cable TV and streaming operate in two ecosystems, streaming is mostly subscriber and ad based. Cable networks rely on ads and "subscriber fees" they charge cable carriers to broadcast their network. 

When Netflix took off and people were cutting the cord in droves. Cable networks and cable companies most owned by conglomerates were too slow and neglectful to adapt. They operated and continue to operate in this more is better mantra that was the ideals of the 90s and 2000s eras of excess.

500 plus channels of mainly niche programming, when people only watch 10 if that and don't have time for much else. Cable networks also got lazy and started rotating "marathons" of the same show. USA network and MTV are notorious for that. Instead of streamlining networks, they kept the status quo while still charging insane monthly premiums. They also pushed a lot of content to streaming, even hard to find content.

Besides today's viewership mostly on the web. People just do not want to switch between 40 channels, and not being able to find one thing that interests them. It's annoying enough on streaming apps.

In order for cable to truly survive, they not only need to reinvent cable. They need to minimize the saturation of cable channels and improve the cable experience and price for consumers. Cable TV is now in survival mode and if they want to keep eating, they have to get their ass up and go to work.

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G.I. Joe Next Movie Should Be A Cartoon

 

During Cinemacon yesterday, Paramount announced that a crossover film between Transformers and G.I. Joe is in development. If you've seen the latest Transformers movie Rise Of The Beast you remember the potential for this was teased.

I enjoyed G.I. Joe The Rise Of Cobra and appreciate it for what it is, essentially a live action movie. My biggest gripe with the film was Cobra's origin story and esthetic changes. Retaliation was a more grounded in reality, had some good action scenes, and set some things right from the first film (Cobra's look), but for whatever reason the majority of audience's didn't enjoy it.

After the failure of both G.I. Joe films and the 2021 Snake Eyes film, my guess is this is Paramount's attempt to salvage the G.I. Joe film franchise. I personally think the live action route is not the way to go for the franchise to move it forward. To get the franchise popular again an animated movie needs to happen.

An animated film would allow the G.I. Joe universe to be as over the top as possible and take more liberties to bring the mythology up to date.  And maybe incorporate some of the wackier aspects of the lore such as Serpentor and his clones. Incorporate some good humor and a core group of Joe's and it could work.

An animated film worked for the Ninja Turtles franchise last summer, it was Fresh and entertaining. And I'm waiting for a part 2. Paramount has an animated Transformers movie releasing in theaters later this year called Transformers One and starring Chris Hemsworth. Even though the live action film keeps falling through, Masters of the Universe has experienced some rejuvenation from the Netflix cartoon series.

If the masterminds at Paramount or potentially the future masterminds if the company is indeed bought, are truly trying to gain more ground and use IP's to their full advantage. They will make a G.I. Joe animated film.

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Streaming Wishlist: Paramount Plus MTV Edition

 In my previous article I touched on what programs I would like to see on the Peacock app. Well I'm back to touch on the Paramount Plus app. I initially got Paramount Plus upon launch when they had a promotion running 31 days free or something like that. At first I was instantly disappointed in the app, because it didn't have a queue. It's a first world problem but in today's streaming world, you need a damn queue. 

Once they woke up and realized the error of they're ways it got a little better. You can find classics on there, and they have had some good mini-series like The Offer. However, for Paramount to be a film studio that is over a 100 years old, and be apart of a conglomerate with so many channels. The app still leaves a lot to be desired. 

Just like the Peacock app, Paramount plus has a variety of programs and movies to add in their selection. Not just from the studio, but from other Viacom companies like CBS Nickelodeon, MTV, BET, and VH1. But I will admit they probably have the weakest offering of programming amongst streaming providers. Coming in a notch below Peacock, which is a shame due to the vast amount of programming in their archives.

To keep this blog as condensed as possible, I'm only going to cover MTV and VH1 in this blog. BET has been covered in a previous blog via BET Plus, and Nickelodeon will get its own blog.

Making The Band 

This one may get a little iffy and I can understand why MTV may shy away from this. The first season aired on ABC and featured notorious scammer Lou Pearlman looking for his next boy band. Which he found with O-Town. Subsequent seasons featured Diddy first making his rap group Da' Band and later Danity Kane and Day26. 

Diddy's version bought us funny moments like having Da' Band walk to Brooklyn for cheesecake. Or the famous Freddy P and Ness fight. To the Day26 curating season producing a soulful acapella faceoff.

Point being we need this show available. 

TRL

Debuting in the fall of 1998, Total Request Live (TRL) was a daily countdown show of the top ten music videos for the day. In a studio overlooking Times Square it didn't take long for the show to be a pop culture juggernaut. Having interviews with the biggest stars at the time most of them in the pop music genre, anybody who was anybody in music visited TRL.

The show is a perfect time capsule of music in the late 90's-early 2000's . Running for eight seasons there is plenty of material to pull from, and make a playlist if they don't want to upload each episode.

True Life

I'll give it to MTV, they really were pioneers of the whole reality TV genre. Starting with The Real World and continuing with True Life. Which was a documentary series that debuted in March of 1998 and featured one subject or various subjects with a particular topic navigating life.

The show ran for 21 seasons and covered topics for just about everyone. Drug use, plastic surgery, aspiring to be a pro wrestler, aspiring to be a MMA fighter. Being homeless, fighting an illness, estranged from their family, sex addicts, coming out to their family, You name it True Life covered it, which is again another good time capsule that should be uploaded and revered. 

2gether

In early 2000 in the middle of the pop music craze, MTV released a original film that was a parody of the craze called 2gether. Which focused on a boy band being assembled with each member fitting a particular stereotype. The movie was actually funny and the original songs were catchy, the film was enough of a success. A TV series was developed and premiered in the fall of 2000.

It only lasted for about 2 seasons, due to the ailing health and eventual passing of one of the cast members. Along with not being able to catch on audiences. Which is a shame because the show was funny and hit the satire aspects right on the nose. Being 20 plus years later the film and TV series may be appreciated more. 

Say What? Karaoke

Everyone loves a good time signing Karaoke in front of a bunch of people you don't know. While your friends and family encourage you or laugh at you. In 1998 MTV took this premise and made a show Say What? Karaoke. Contestants competed against one another singing songs, while the lyrics played on a ticker on the screen for the at home audience.

It really was the parent for Lip Sync Battle when you think about it. Which also needs to be on Paramount Plus. Anyway it was all in good fun, people dressed weird as shit for some reason, and when we are looking for mindless entertainment. It should be a option on the app.

Singled Out

Before MTV lost touch with it's musical heritage and played reruns of Ridiclousness all day. They would branch out from time to time on programming. Which introduced Singled Out a dating game show that debuted in 1995 on the network. It featured 50 contestants vying for a date with either a man or woman on the show.

The show's legacy is probably more associated with it's hosts like Carmen Electra, Jenny Mccarthy, and Chris Hardwick then anything that really happened on the show. Honestly for situations like Valentines day coming up, it wouldn't hurt to have a few episodes available for viewing for old times sake.

VH1

When I researched VH1's programming history to refresh my memory. They have been on the cheap, reality TV based on former stars format for a lot longer than I remember. Paramount Plus has waken up and put episodes of Behind The Music on there, so they really only leaves us with three classic VH1 programs they need to bring back.

Pop up video 

I am a sucker for useless facts honestly, which is probably why Pop Up Video drew me in as a kid. It was either that or the catchy theme song. In this information heavy digital age, there is so much at our fingertips, but would we really know to look up who was late to the set for a music video? Probably not, which is why pop up video was so great.

Uploading all episodes of Pop Up Video may be worth the subscription price of the app itself. OK, I'm lying but I would be a very happy customer if I opened the app and was able to watch a bevy of useless facts while bopping my head.

I Love The....

I'm a sucker for nostalgia I'm sure you can tell. So Vh1 sucked me in around the mid-2000's when they produced a series of programs featuring celebrities and pop culture reporters commenting on pop culture moments of yesteryear. They covered the 70's, 80's and 90's and the 2000's. It's fun to look back and go I forgot all about that, oh I remember that craze, or damn I wasn't born yet or just too young to appreciate xyz.

Honors Series

I'm not sure if it's a music rights and getting clearance thing, but there is no reason the Honors specials shouldn't be available. Divas Live, Hip Hop Honors, Rock Honors. Much like MTV, VH1 has shied away from it's musical heritage and all the great programming it produced before moving to a primarily reality TV station. 

Bring music back to the forefront and have these programs available to rock out to again, giving the legends their flowers. 

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G.I. Joe The Rise Of Cobra Deserves A Second Look

Today marks 10 years since G.I. Joe The Rise of Cobra was released in theaters. Highly anticipated when it was released due to being a live action interpretation of the beloved G.I. Joe brand and the flashy trailers highlighting plenty of action. The film was trashed by critics, while receiving mixed reviews from fans upon it's debut. Looking back at it ten years later the film definitely has it's flaws but it actually deserves a second chance, here are three reasons why.

Action Scenes

The beginning of the film starts off very brisk substituting providing much of a plot to get to the point of action. The first action scene in the film is a very exciting scene, and sets the tone for what I believe the film was going for. A modern day "roller coaster" adventure film containing just enough story to move the plot forward and head to the next action beat. The martial arts scenes between Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow did not disappoint at all, and Ray Park was born to play Snake Eyes. The chase through the streets of Paris no matter how cartoonish, outlandish and all over the place it  was, is alot of fun and a highlight of the film. 

Live Action Cartoon

While many adaptions and reboots today take a darker more serious tone (i.e. Power Rangers released in 2017). G.I. Joe tried to maintain the feel of a live action cartoon. This included some very corny dialogue and callbacks to traditional G.I. Joe slogans. The film tried it's best to pay homage and include G.I. Joe code names, and locations/headquarters. Some of the sets including the G.I. Joe headquarters and the submarine of Destro along with some of the science in the film had cartoon elements to it. The film isn't really grounded in reality but I believe that was part of the point.

Technology

Released a year after Iron Man spearheaded the MCU and a year before it's sequel, the technology in the Rise of Cobra rivals that of a world inhabited by Tony Stark. With the combination of technology and weaponry used in the recently released "Hobbs & Shaw", this film may have been ahead of the curve in the marriage of weapons and technology. G.I. Joe features nanotechnology called "nanomites" that can be programmed to attack and "eat" through any material. Or it can be used as a mind control device once implanted into a subject. In addition holographic communication, laser guns, devices that can read and display the memories of a dying villain. Fighter jets that rely on voice activation and commands to fly and shoot sonic missiles. Mechanical accelerator suits that provided superhuman abilities to the wearers.  Underwater headquarters, secret bases with state of the art technology. A technology geeks wet dream is displayed in this film.

Overview

Surely the filmmakers made a huge mistake with their handling and backstory of Cobra Commander. Making him a doctor gone "crazy" as opposed to a maniac who just wants to take over the world. Altering his mask for the worse was not a smart decision at all. This iteration of Cobra Commander was a far cry from the Cobra Commander everyone loved to hate. Making Duke and Baroness lost lovers also was a unnecessary subplot. A few years later a sequel G.I. Joe Retaliation  was released that attempted to rectify some of the issues. While that movie was more grounded in reality and generally more well received it still had it's share of problems and the planned franchise was halted. Hasbro and Paramount are developing another G.I. Joe film and planned spinoff, hopefully they can find the right components of The Rise of Cobra and Retaliation to make a truly great G.I. Joe film that satisfies all fans.

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